The power of empathy in student engagement

If you want to be good at engaging with the young people you work with its integral that you “Tune In” to them.

Tune in to their world, their needs, their drivers, their interests, their aspirations.

In a world where we are so bombarded with stimuli, messages, people and agendas competing for our attention and our head space – its certainly easy for us to fall into the trap of missing the things which are important to and play a huge role in creating connection and engagement in the lives of the young people we work with.

Did you know that according to Psychologist and Professor Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi Author of the book “Flow”, every second our brains are bombarded with over 2,000,000 bits of information, through our 5 senses.

The biggest problem, is that our brain can only process 134 out of those 2,000,000 bits of data.

So one of the jobs our amazing brain does is to delete, distort and generalise that data, according to the filters we create and what is seen as relevant to us in the moment.

Let me ask you a few questions:

• Were you aware of the feel of your clothes on your skin before you read this question? (But you are now)
• Were you aware of the whir of your computer fan before you read this question? (But you are now)

Have you ever gone through the process of selecting a new or second hand car to purchase – deciding on the make and the colour?  Then almost the very next day, you’re driving down the street and it appears that everyone else has made the same decision, because you start seeing that car everywhere!

Its not magic and no everyone else didn’t all of a sudden go out and buy your car – no body has been reading your mind.  That is your brain, filtering IN relevant information, based on your focus… Its your brain TUNING IN relevant data.

What you decide to focus on is one of the most powerful ways you can TUNE IN to what is going on in the world around you.

If you make a conscious decision to TUNE IN to your students and what is going on in their world, you will start to notice that it becomes an automatic part of your awareness.

Try TUNING IN to the following NON SCHOOL RELATED parts of your young peoples world, things which are completely disconnected from your particular classroom program or subject matter:

• What music do they like?
• What sports do they play?
• What tv shows do they watch?
• Who are their heroes?
• What do they do in their spare time?
• What are their aspirations?
• What challenges do they have in their world at the moment?

By engaging young people by NOTICING what they are interested in and what makes them come alive, and then engaging them in conversations about it (Hey Jimmy, I noticed you like __________! Tell me about that.) you’re telling the young person that you care about them and you’re actually paying attention to them above and beyond your classroom/subject/program.

Here’s a challenge for you… (Engagement Challenge #1)

Select a few of your more disengaged young people and for the rest of this term – try and identify 1 or 2 things each time you come in contact with them, that you can use to engage them in conversation.

Use the “Hey _______, I noticed ________, can you tell me more about that” create a conversation, show some interest and see how things start to shift.

I’d love to hear your feedback at the end of term – let me know how it plays out for you.

Remember – Relationship is number 1, Manage yourself and your own state and tune in!

Check out the remaining articles relating to “How to motivate and engage teenagers”:

• The silver bullet for student engagement
• The power of empathy in student engagement
• Emotional Intelligence in student engagement
• How to use rewards to motivate students
• How to increase student engagement
• How to effectively communicate with teens

I am regularly running professional development workshops for teachers, youth workers and professionals around based on the principals of developmental psychology, positive psychology and neuroscience to help adults understand teenagers and how best to engage, inspire and empower them to know themselves, be their best and make a positive difference in the world.

I’d love to talk to you about how I might be able to support your organisation and empower you to connect with, engage and motivate the young people you work with – for booking enquiries click here!